CHILDREN AND LIFE

I’ve come to realise the benefits of motherhood – it has taken quite some time, but I am now reaping the harvest of my life. I have two sons, the elder is 24 years old and the younger is 19, they have both grown up to be honest and hardworking young men - loyal to their friends and family and generous in spirit and deed – those who have reaped their kindness range from the tiniest of babies to the smelliest of tramps in the streets of London.

Today my two wonderful sons took me out for lunch – granted I did ask them to take me out, but in their defence they were quite happy to treat their old Mum to a local tex-mex meal at Chiquitos in Staples Corner. As is usual in our family, we all ate far too much!!

All this loving and kindness, makes me wonder how some families can be so cruel to each other? You read in the newspapers every week, about child abuse: sexual, physical and mental abuse. You walk into any bookshop and can pick up at least 20 different books with biographies about terrible childhoods and how each of these children overcame their awful lives to become successful adults. I have read quite a lot of these books and am appalled at how cold and cruel a Mother, Father or any other family member can be to one of their own and what it is that makes them behave in this way to another human being? What amazes me even more is the way these abused children seem to overcome every obstacle and ultimately break away from their abusers. I sometimes wonder why people – why I – read these books?? Is it perhaps that we want to confirm that we are better people, because we would never do this to our children? Maybe we read them and give thanks that our lives were nothing like these beleaguered children? Or maybe some people are just sick and get pleasure out of reading about someone else’s suffering? Whichever is the reason these books are an extremely popular genre and perhaps an inspiration to those who might be suffering abuse at home.

While we are on the subject of children and suffering have a look at the NSPCC website, maybe you can make a difference.

I also thought I might list a few of the ones I have read and perhaps you might try some and let me know what you think.

BIOGRAPHICAL BOOKS

Angela’s Ashes – Frank McCourt (A hard childhood in Ireland)

A Child Called It – Dave Pelzer (A mother’s cruelty towards her son)

A Brothers journey: Surviving a childhood of abuse – Richard B. Pelzer (Dave Pelzer’s brother, who suffered after his brother had left the family home)

Ugly – Constance Briscoe (A mother’s cruelty towards her daughter – also a father’s neglect)

OTHER STORIES ABOUT CHILD ABUSE

The Colour Purple – Alice Walker

I know why the caged bird sings – Maya Angelou

I know this might all sound really depressing, but one of the main things I noticed about all these stories was that while the children in question were being abused other adults, not the abusers, were standing by and allowing all of it to happen – making them almost as bad as the abusers themselves!!

If you read any of these books, learn by them and appreciate your comfortable and safe lives.

Goodnight, sleep tight and don’t let the bedbugs bite.

Jo xx